I've been staring at this blank page for quite a while (I mean for two weeks, lol) cause I really dont know what to write. But there's always this one thought that kept on banging on my mind.
Caution: numerous informal words and cursing might be used, so if you're not comfortable of reading those words, might as well not read this blog post. :)
I've been thinking the same stuff every time. Like when I can't sleep, when I'm at school doing my plates, even when I'm in the shower. It's the same thought that I've been willing to do my whole life. Or the thought that you'll be thinking while watching a movie or listening to some musics or reading books and the likes.
When I was young, I used to believed in fairy tales and happy ever afters. Admit it, you did too. I used to believe that everything is fine as long as you're happy... I used to believe that you are loved as long as you're together... But I was wrong.
It sucks when everything that you believed in are all bullshits. I learned that at a very young age. I couldn't remember how many times I tried to point a knife to myself when I was young. I was very confused and I don't know what to do to my fucked up life. I thought that screwing would be okay because no one seems to care. But I won't recommend that you should screw your fucked up life because it will only make you life more... uhmm... fucked up.
As much as I want to rant about my life blah blah blah, I would just share to you guys the thoughts that kept on bugging me these passed few weeks.
It's pathetic how a single person can emotionally and physically ruin other people. Like for example, relationships. I really find it stupid when a person thinks that his/her life is ruined when they broke up with someone. Isn't that how relationships work? If you're meant to be then you're good, but when it didn't work out then let go and move on. There's no point of holding it back if you both know that it'll go nowhere. Why couldn't you just accept the fact that you'll never ever getting back together, as Taylor Swift would say, and learn to move on and take it as a lesson or something. I'm not saying these because I don't have a boyfriend or I'm being bitter or anything. Believe me, I've been through a lot, I've seen worst. And yeah, I had relationships which taught me A LOT of lessons in life. Besides, we're young, we still have a lot of things to learn. Just don't try to find love, and love will find you.
Don't try to change yourself just because you wanted to please everyone. The only person that you should be pleasing is yourself. If you are the type of person that kept on downing himself just because a person said that you are worthless then you're stupid. I wouldn't suggest that ever famous quotation that everyone is saying; "Be Yourself" If you ask me, I would say that: Dont just try to be yourself, Be better. Be the better person the world badly needed now. (whoa) If you want to do something, then go. No one is stopping you. If you're afraid that people might judge you then... uhm, well excuse me while I virtually throw my laptop to you. I'm saying that don't be a coward. You know, every once in a while, you should step out of your comfort zone and do something new. Who cares what other people say. As long as you're doing what you want and what you do best.
It's stupid that some people think that bullying would work their way up the social pyramid. Don't let anyone crush you like bugs. Stand up for yourself, because no one else will help you but yourself. In this world, you're on your own. It's hard to find a loyal and trustworthy friends nowadays. So if I were you, I would pick my friends carefully and wisely. We cant control the fact that our so called friends becomes our enemies. Frienemies, get it? It's the combination of the words friend and enemies, get it? get it?? anyway, we should laugh off those stupid people who kept on bothering us.
If you know better, you will not level yourself with those kind of people. Don't pull yourself down just because some jerks tell things about you. They're just jealous. Jealous people tend to create or say stuffs that can ruin your reputation. Just dont be affected, because it will only prove that they are right, right?
Cut out the invisible string that bind you from your comfort zone and get out, be free. Fly like a beautiful butterfly (wtf?) Live your own life. Because the moment that you are living, that is the time that you can say that you are truly alive. We are the controller of ourselves. We set our OWN future. God is the path. We are the drivers.
This is probably the longest blog post that I've posted so far. So uhm, as much as I wanted to share to you guys my daily thought, I figured that I will post them on my next blog post so stay tuned. It's been raining here in Manila for two consecutive days and the news said that several places in the Philippines are already flooded, like chest high or so. It's cray so please do pray for the Philippines.
I really hope that you got something from this post so it wouldn't turn out to be pointless. I'll just leave you guys with a phrase that I kept on saying to myself..
Dont antagonize your own story.
Doesn't make sense? Well, It's up to you. I just did my part :)
Laters, xx.
